What makes a day school inclusive?

Among the most important values that define my school, inclusiveness ranks among the top. I am proud that we have a diversity of races, ethnic origins and economic backgrounds. In many ways, my school is much more diverse than any other Jewish day school in which I have worked. In addition to all of this diversity, we also welcome a tremendous breadth of religious identities under one roof. We include students from Reform and Orthodox households alongside our base in the Conservative Movement. Just how does that diversity work? Yesterday, I (literally) got a taste.

As a reward to our fifth grade class for some of their achievements over the last month, I offered them a hot dog barbeque. (Yes, I cooked!) As we sat down to eat, one student came to me with a question “I just had milk chocolate as part of my snack. May I still eat a hot dog?” What followed was a great conversation.

Even before we discussed the traditional practice (most people will eat meat after a diary snack, but wait anywhere from one to six hours after a meat meal before having dairy), we had a more important conversation about keeping Kosher. Some students do. Some students don’t. Some of those who don’t keep kosher avoid certain foods like pork. At the same time, those who do keep kosher do so in a range of very different ways. No two students did exactly the same thing. Our student discussed what the school’s policy should be, and everyone seemed to agree that whether a family does or does not keep Kosher, everyone needed to respect the fact that they made an informed choice.

Finally, our fifth graders agreed that the school made a good decision in its policy for school lunches, school events and birthday parties (don’t forget about them!). They felt that we were a stronger community if we made sure that everyone, from the child who kept kosher to the child who did not, was equally included. To the kids, it made perfect sense.

As adults, it should be equally clear. Attending a Jewish day school is an opportunity to explore Jewish life. Each household has to do this on its own terms. And each person has a unique choice about their Jewish life that only they can make. I personally see that many of our families are on a journey to enrich the level of meaning in their Jewish lives. That’s the whole reason that many of them come to a Jewish day school in the first place. By creating an environment in which we provide knowledge and the confidence to make Jewish decisions that are authentic for each individual family, our school fulfills its mission of strengthening Jewish life in St. Louis.

I see a deep respect for the individual journey of every person as a cornerstone of our institutional commitment to “Excellence, Israel and Tradition.” Our school should be a place where every child and parent comes to discover something deeper about their identity. Yesterday, with charcoal blazing and questions flying, our fifth graders took one further step on that journey. We should be proud of all they have learned.